826 Valencia - Store Log

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What happens at the Store?

Many have said that upon entering the best pirate supply store in San Francisco, they get a sensation of déjà vu. Others walk in and feel at once the miracle work of an unseen hand. Yet there are those whose eyes bulge and shrink simultaneously while their thoughts are so convoluted that they are unable to shout or mutter the question that most plagues them: “What is this place?”

The store log is weekly account of actual events that occur in the shop, as well as testimonials, comments and complaints from our customers.

December 31, 2007

Q: If you're French in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom?

A: European.

December 24, 2007

Today a young lad bought an eyepatch. Why, you ask? Because he has been using a telescope and does not enjoy closing one eye.

December 17, 2007

I Didn't Know This Was a Restaurant and Other Common Misperceptions About the 826 Valencia Pirate Supply Store

partial list

1. "I didn't know this was a restaurant."

True, the children sit neatly in six-tops eating delicious snacks whilst adults quickly and politely honor their requests. Be unfooled!

2. "I didn't know this was a sweatshop."

See above, and notice the lack of sewing machines and sweat.

3. Pirate Dan's mustache is phony.

Many stories Pirate Dan tells us are gross fabrications, usually involving himself as the supreme victor of some imaginary contest. (What is this...this karaoke?) His facial hair, however, is 100% natural and luxurious.

4. I can pull the string.

What string? And no, you cannot pull the string. If there was a string to pull. Which there isn't. Except for this one. But never mind that.

5. Otka puffs when she's happy.

No. And now everyone's sick. She does enjoy scampi, though.

December 10, 2007

"Once upon a time...a chicken laid a dime...then...um...then the chicken dropped dead."

- Eli, 3

December 03, 2007

This Week's New Items

- Sea hose in new colors

- Pewter buttons

- Velvet captain's hats

- Felt hats with feathers

- Jabots and lacy cuffs

- Seashell mood rings

- Skull rings

- Sideburns (100% human hair)

- Better music. I mean, really...


	*Archives* June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005		What happens at the Store? Many have said that upon entering the best pirate supply store in San Francisco, they get a sensation of déjà vu. Others walk in and feel at once the miracle work of an unseen hand. Yet there are those whose eyes bulge and shrink simultaneously while their thoughts are so convoluted that they are unable to shout or mutter the question that most plagues them: “What is this place?” The store log is weekly account of actual events that occur in the shop, as well as testimonials, comments and complaints from our customers. December 31, 2007 Q: If you're French in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? A: European. December 24, 2007 Today a young lad bought an eyepatch. Why, you ask? Because he has been using a telescope and does not enjoy closing one eye. December 17, 2007 I Didn't Know This Was a Restaurant and Other Common Misperceptions About the 826 Valencia Pirate Supply Store partial list 1. "I didn't know this was a restaurant." True, the children sit neatly in six-tops eating delicious snacks whilst adults quickly and politely honor their requests. Be unfooled! 2. "I didn't know this was a sweatshop." See above, and notice the lack of sewing machines and sweat. 3. Pirate Dan's mustache is phony. Many stories Pirate Dan tells us are gross fabrications, usually involving himself as the supreme victor of some imaginary contest. (What is this...this karaoke?) His facial hair, however, is 100% natural and luxurious. 4. I can pull the string. What string? And no, you cannot pull the string. If there was a string to pull. Which there isn't. Except for this one. But never mind that. 5. Otka puffs when she's happy. No. And now everyone's sick. She does enjoy scampi, though. December 10, 2007 "Once upon a time...a chicken laid a dime...then...um...then the chicken dropped dead." - Eli, 3 December 03, 2007 This Week's New Items - Sea hose in new colors - Pewter buttons - Velvet captain's hats - Felt hats with feathers - Jabots and lacy cuffs - Seashell mood rings - Skull rings - Sideburns (100% human hair) - Better music. I mean, really...